Saying Goodbye and Letting Go
This topic is tender for all who experience it as the feelings associated with loss are often times overwhelming whether they stem from death or non-death related loss.
I have found that most people have no training or knowledge in or about saying goodbye. All psychological work is grief work in that people are attempting to hold on to something or someone who is no longer in their life as it or they were in the past and are now experiencing the pain of letting go so they can take their life back.
Grief work is what is done to recover from co-dependency (the loss of one's sense of self), shame, behavioral or chemical addictive disorders, living with a chemical or behavioral addict, children leaving or not leaving home, not being able to have children, getting married, resolving differences at work or in a relationship, developing trust, children graduating, getting into trouble, going to jail, getting out of jail, incest, sexual abuse, rape, divorce, loss of mental health, PTSD, separation, body parts, loss of physical health, loss of sense of self, self-esteem, self-worth, retirement, moves and so much more.
Therapy that includes a focus on grief helps you let go sooner and at a deeper level which makes for a long lasting solid recovery.
It is hard work so asking yourself many times "do I want to recover" an important question to keep you motivated, if you answered yes. The time it takes to recover is completely up to you. Time does not heal anything.
I use typical talk therapy, motivational techniques, time line theapy, imagery, CBT, DBT, energy psychology, acupressure tapping TFT/EFT, massage, Reiki and other chakra balancing techniques. If the bad in one's life can happen in an instant so can recovery take place in an instant, the law of duality. Regardless, it is not time that heals, it is what one does with time. If time healed wounds we would not have so many pissed off old people.
I have found that as soon as you can identify and say your truth loudly, honestly with full meaning behind your expression of (anger, hurt, sorrow, amends, thank you, forgiveness, take with you, leave with me, and anything else) you can then say goodbye to the person, place, thing, feeling or event and then be able to decide now what kind and type of relationship you want to have with it or them now.
Grief recovery is not about forgetting - it is about deciding how you will remember the person, place, thing or event that is no longer in your life now.
Our life walk has joys, sadness, hopes, dreams, death, birth , loss, loves, anger, hurt, forgiveness, growth, slide backs, addiction, dysfunction, recovery, relapse, regrets, trauma, shame, loss of sense of self.
Embrace it all, after all it is your life, claim it.
LCDC's, Social workers, Critical Care workers, Professionals working with PTSD, EAP's, LMFT's, LPC's, Ph.D's, MD's, Nurses, Ministers, Clergy, Grief Counselors will all benefit from this work. CEU's available. c4, c4a, 60 hour Certification Course
Michael Yeager B.A., LCDC, C.ht, CAS, SAP, Certified Grief Recovery Counselor - Owner of Contemporary Teaching, Clinical Director of The Council on Holistic Healing and Recovery, 2122 Rosefield Dr, Houston, Texas 77080 - 713-461-3279 - firstname.lastname@example.org.
Since 1973 he has helped people find what they are looking for in themselves. Since 1989 he began provided therapist and mental health workers CEU's through live and homestudy and Skype clinical trainings.